Has it been that long?!

So…I never forgot about this, just put it off one day …and that turned into a week,  then a month, then 4 months….and now here we are :/

I am embarrassed as hell (sigh) and contemplated just forgetting about it all together (I kno.. I know…smh) BUT…I’d still see the app on my phone as I pass it by on my way to instagram. So I decided that my writing IS important… is HAS to be if I want to improve, to grow, to actually write for a living…

As scarry as it might be (and embarrassing) I’m back!  And will continue this as long as I dont bore you to death can …stay tuned 😉


“Bitch don’t kill my vibe…”

Love that song =)

Ghetto, yes I know. But the message…THE MESSAGE is there…lolImage

It all starts with a thought…a small glimmer of imagination that is infused with possibility, and that is all that’s needed to start  a new thought pattern. Is is scary?, Duh! No one wants to have their dreams stomped on…lol. None of us wants to hear  “really? da fuck were you thinking??” even if they don’t say it… You know when they THINK IT.

The worse part is, that no one puts us down more than ourselves. WE are the ones that pop our own bubbles before they even have a chance; and to put it bluntly.. SHYYT, if you don’t believe in yourself, why the hell should I? Granted that there are people that need you to believe in them first so that they can believe in themselves. For the most part though, when you half ass say what your hoping for and then act like its no big deal..yeah, no one is gonna act like it is a big deal.

I truly believe we all have some very specific-to-us kinda talents..the kind that you have no idea how it is that you do it, but you do it… kinda stuff and yet its all nicely wrapped and sitting in your closet …forgotten ( like the library book you were supposed to return- 3 years ago) Porque?

Who told you that was a bad idea ( besides yourself), your friends? family? co-workers? baby Daddy/Momma? and you believed them because????- my point exactly. You probably aren’t that “great” of a listener anyways right? ( you ain’t gotta lie Craig..you ain’t, lol) Didn’t listen about the guy your girls told you not to date, didn’t listen to your “boys” who told you NOT to “hit that”, didn’t listen to your parents who told to move out/move in and you sure as hell don’t listen to yourself about getting more sleep and doing shit around la casa right? Ok, so WTF are u listening now for?

Get on wit yo bad self! try it out, see what happens, if you fuck up, nimodo..try again =) There is nothing worse than feeling inspired, ready and damn motivated then not acting on your ideas because you are afraid of what people will think, or you might not get the response your looking for.

Well…. 10 year from now ( at 30, 40, 50 years old) when your chillin’ with your homies ( the same ones from 8th grade who haven’t done shit all their lives) and your wondering why the hell your life sucks and you still haven’t been to a raider game ( not that you’ve missed much..lol *sorry raider fans: hubby, bro..), traveled as far as you wanted to, bought the home of your dreams, paid off all those credit card bills,  guess fuckin’ what…

You had it, you felt the energy, the motivation was there and you let it go Fuckin’ dumb ass Start again.. NOW, like seriously.. NOW! and the next time some one tries to step and say your idea is crap, they roll their eyes, they sigh, tell ’em “and what the fuck might you be doing that’s so damn astonishing, hmmmm, oh what’s that?nothing??”   delete the convo in your mind and move the fuck on…while you play this song (loudly) for added affect =)

Remix: “Bitch you can’t kill MY vibe”

Throwing out trash…

Short, sweet and to the point: When you eat a banana, you throw away the peel right? like the normal person that you are… you don’t keep it and see what else you can do with it, you don’t leave it around lingering in your kitchen, you dump that shit!Image

So now WHY the fuck does one keep holding on to shit that don’t work, don’t serve a purpose, cant bring you happiness, and has no room in your life? ( not talking about clutter right now.. I know I have a shitload to shred..lol- that’s another topic though)

Life is to damn short to fill it with shit; and yet that is exactly what is done. I WISH homegirl would just ask my opinion on what to do so I could  go off on her calmly explain that she has it all wrong,

Don’t get me wrong, we all need to vent… my friends and I have held ” therapy sessions” (side by side with alcohol to get us really digging up what we want to vent about..good times right). But listening to the never ending sad story about why nothing ever works and you and how everything is harder when you have to do it yourself…smh  ” bitch you see that phone..that ‘smart ‘one with all the damn txt’ing, fb, twitter, instagram, e-mail, auto number dial, speed dial… and you say your all alone?! ” no one listens to me” you say? well that’s because we are all tired of the same story.. try eating pizza for breakfast 350 days in a row… bet your gonna get tired of it right?

We need to be constantly aware of the things that hold us back and affect our attitudes for the worst ( throw them 2 month old bananas away already!) You know when something just doesn’t belong in your life anymore…your mood changes, your irritated, you feel off, and you loose your focus. So why keep that shit? I know:  ” It’s much more complicated than that though!” I get it ( kinda) but every day you keep carrying all those old banana peels with you in your purse adds up- and it starts to stink , so even if you threw away one banana peel at a time, ( one idea that no longer serves you) imajinate chencha?! little by little your life would improve ( and you’d have to get a new story tambien) your homies would love to be around you once again and you might even want to get some from your hunny ( THAT , im sure he would appreciate..lol) Be aware of the shit you keep and carry with you all the time, its much more obvious than you think =)

What is one Idea/ person/ thing/ view point etc that you want to throw out?

What makes YOU… YOU

Too many times we are caught up with the stuff life throws at us, we work, we cook, we care for others, we deal with drama, we mourn, we suffer we attend quinces, weddings, funerals, we shop for groceries, we shop for others we bake…In short, WE DO.

Most of us share hasta lo que no tenemos ( even what we don’t have) because we love to care and be supportive- to the extent that many will take it all for granted. relatives/ friends/ etc begin to expect us to be there, they don’t notice when we need attention or support.

It used to piss me off to see family being treated so badly- they never asked for it, they did and did, and did, and did until they could not do no more. and then I realized….

Al those people “that did” trained others how to treat them. I had to go back and think for a minute of some instances where things didn’t seem right. As soon as I had the image in my mind another followed… my grandma serving herself last and never eating at the table, my aunt taking belittling comments about the house not being cleaned when she had been at work all day, myself; trying to fit in one more thing when I know damn well that I can’t !

At the end of the day, were exhausted of giving to others and never giving to ourselves. We do it ( err, NOT DO IT) so that others don’t think of us as selfish, or so we can get a few “dang, how does she do it?!” meanwhile.. we’re pissed, irritated, talking shit about those around us that forget who did what for who and never say thank you…

Little by little these “little things” start to build, and before you know it, “doing” for others isn’t something we want to do anymore and we begin to feel resentful.

We all need a moment of ” me time” to unwind, reflect and recharge… When we run through life so fast, there is no way to take it all in and find inspiration.

Your children,significant other, grand kids, neighbors, homies, BFF’s…NONE of them want you to do things for them in a bad resentful and irritated mood, then act like no one cares about you.

What makes you, well.. YOU? what makes people want to be around you, or  what is it about that other person that makes you want to be around them? what makes it possible for you to continue doing what you do ( with love) ?

YAY.. You’re here!!!

So my biggest fear (among others) is writing..like publicly. I’ve always liked to write and naturally I always think I make perfect sense (because no one else reads my shit to tell me otherwise). Well, after talking about for a year and fantasizing about what i would do, I finally decided (at a friends suggestion) to “jump into the frying pan” LOL. In case your wondering what to expect, I’ll just say:
– I talk a lot… A LOT. finding another person who talks equally as much as i do is…Heaven
– I cuss a lot …A LOT. I like to think of it as adding seasoning to my sentences
– I love arte, music ( OMG a day at work without Pandora..smh, Don’t think I could deal) heels, lipstick (not lip gloss…just want to make that distinction) biscuits and gravy, new pens, calligraphy, sunshine, Pepsi, Ideas, the color yellow and … I could go on forever, but I’ll stop there (YW)

I picked up my munchkin from school today and her homework was to bring a “ME” bag to school tomorrow – A bag with 5 small things that represnt you. she asked me “what would You put in your bag momma?” so I thought about it for a minute…hmmm 5 things (small things) must choose carefully..hmmm. and within 10 seconds.. I got it =)

If you had to put a “ME” bag together what would you put in it?